Sunday, September 7, 2008

ain't it funny how the time goes by

13.3% raised for Spain! 115 days until I leave AZ!

Starting a few days ago, I have become more emotional than usual. Somehow the reality that I was leaving 3 days earlier for Spain sent me into this downward spiral. Seriously? In the grand scheme of it, 3 days in the course of the next 4 months is almost nothing... and yet here I am. I am not trying to say that God has not blessed me through this process thus far. He continually shows me every day His amazing perfection and new plans for me. I just worry about what will happen while I am gone. I don't even worry for myself. I know that I will be fine in Spain and I cannot wait to see Jesse, Sophie and everyone else there. I worry about what will happen while I am gone. My friends will continue to grow and change, my family will be different, my mom will worry every single day until I get home, I will miss singing in 3F and being with the guys in the band (and Tara when she gets home), I am going to miss out on precious days of my Jr high girls (both old and new) growing up and in their faith. I wonder if this is going to hurt the friendships I have built this last year. I want so much to find that person that God has prepared for me, but is it stupid to look for a relationship when I am leaving the country for 6 months?

I know that it is ridiculous to worry about these things, especially now. I should be enjoying the moments here and saving the memories for the time I am gone. I just can't my mind off of it.


Another Bethany Joy song that I love (and would love to sing)is called "leaving Town Alive" I can't get the embed or the link to work right now... but look it up if you have the time.

2 comments:

Brandy said...

Oh Cassie. All these things you're worrying about is VERY normal. But you just have to trust God and know that He will take care of everything.
And as far as your new friends (Hey! That's me!!!), as well as your old ones, we will be here holding the fort down, praying for you, watching how God changes you, how you grow in God, waiting for you to come back!
Bendiciones y amor!

Tara K said...

So I completely understand how you're feeling right now. I felt the same way before leaving for Australia. I was on a rollercoaster of emotions a few months before I left. I would be feeling excited, sad, nervous, anxious, worried, even angry sometimes. And it was hard, for sure it was. But the journey that I've gone on this year with God has been the most rewarding and growing times of my life. Yes, I miss home and friends and family a lot, but when I think about it... this is only 1 year out of my life, it's nothing! And for you, it's even less. And people will change and life will go on while you're gone, but just try your best to keep in touch with everyone, and don't miss out on what God has for you in Spain.

I'm gonna miss you when you go (and thanks for mentioning me in this) :-), but seriously you're going to have the most amazing time there. And I'm believing for you and God to grow deeper than you ever have before.

Sorry this is so long.. but I'll see you in a few months! And just know that this is God's plan for your life and just imagine how much this is going to not only impact your life, but the lives of the students you will build friendships with. It will be for the good, I know it!

Bendiciones amiga!